Today was the day for my SHG to be performed. Jeremy took Emily this morning and dropped her off with my mom on his way to work. The paperwork that I received from the clinic stated that I should get to the office 30 minutes before my appointment, so I did.
Let me digress for a moment with a question. If you were with your husband in a crowded waiting room and three women were standing due to lack of chairs would you suggest that your husband offer his seat to the women who were standing? I would. There were three men sitting in seats while three women stood around trying to blend into the walls, me being one of them. Maybe I'm just too old fashioned for my own good.
Anyhow, I got to the office early, but didn't really need to. Most of my time waiting was due to this error in judgement on my part. The nurse called me and led me to a room where I had to undress from my waist down and cover myself with a paper "blanket". After a short wait the doctor showed up with the nurse and we got down to business.
I should mention now that this is the first male doctor I have ever had. I thought it would be harder to get used to a male doctor doing stuff "down there" but it's been a lot easier to get used to than I thought it would be. First the doctor put that thingy in to open things up. I forget the official term for this tool of death. My prior doctor would place it in a way that would make me want to jump through the roof. Luckily this new doc has not found that sensitive area and I am so grateful.
Next, a lot of iodine was applied all over. I'm assuming around this time the catheter was inserted. This was when the doc said, "Now you'll be feeling a lit--" GOOD LAWD, OMG I-THINK-I-GOT-PREGNANT-AND-AM-HAVING-A-BABY-RIGHT-NOW-THIS-DOCTOR-IS-A-FRICKEN-MIRACLE-WORKER-AND-I'M-IN-LABOR kind of pain began. "tle cramping right about now." Well no shit Sherlock. You might want to slow down your hands and use your mouth a little quicker next time. Just a thought.
Luckily the cramping only lasted for a short time. I tried to remember that breathing technique that I never used when having Emily and it sort of worked. Although, having never really done it before, I kind of sucked at it and just resorted to saying, "This just isn't happening." over and over in my head.
The pain finally went away and the doctor announced, "We're all done and everything looks great!" YAY! My Ute made me happy today. One thing I find funny is that the doctor always shakes my hand after each prodecure. I guess that's supposed to make me feel less violated.
Utes obviously don't like to be messed with because I had some pretty bad cramping the rest of the day. That didn't stop my fat butt from going out to lunch with my husband though. I'm sure he thoroughly enjoyed my ramblings on of my "woman problems" over Brazilian BBQ.